Last night was fun, not a gong show like I feared...But it was fun. Some people didn’t show up, that was OK though, the people that mattered were there.

Rick got razzed a bit because he ACTUALLY SHOWED UP! We were all kind of surprised....LOL!

I did partake of quite a bit of alcohol, but did not get drunk...What’s up with that? ...Maybe it was all the great food we had.

I received a group gift.....

A 32 inch T.V. It doesn’t fit in my entertainment unit.

Everyone kept giving me these great gift bags with just cards in them...I wasn’t confused or upset by this I just kept thinking “Oh I hope it’s some thing for the house...”

What I mean by some thing for the house is a new dryer, it’s what I asked for, but Tessa told them “No, she wants a new big T.V.”....MMMM. No. That’s what SHE wanted, I was just fine with my 20 inch T.V.

Don’t get me wrong I really like the new one, and once we get the right stand for it, it will look great in my house, just not something I needed. Ya know?

April gave me a T-shirt that says:

 

“40 SUCKS...

   And then you dye....

(your hair)”

 

Of course the big joke of that is I’ve been dying my hair since I was 14 LOL!

 

Then when we left April, Rick, and I came back to my house....And we sat (April and I) and watched Rick lift and set up the massive T.V. As we sat and talked I drank from the very large bottle of Rye (whiskey) Rick gave me...Well not straight from the bottle I had a glass and I mixed it with gingerale...Again still not feeling it like I should. And yes, the bottle was not the gift from Rick I have been hinting at (with the subtly of a sledge hammer.) for months.... Meh!

If I think about that I will be in a bad mood and I don’t want to be in a bad mood right now.

Well there is a little more to tell, but this cold is still kicking my butt and I have to make dinner, I’ll be back later....Or tomorrow...When ever.

Have a great night.

 

 

 

 

 

 

I have the WORST head and chest cold, thanks to the little germ bags that invade my house daily.

But that is NOT going to stop me from going out and having a big ole steak and mass amounts of tasty blender drinks!

When I said I was kind of dreading today, I didn't mean I dreaded turning 40, I really don't mind that... Cause I don't look it! *hehehe*

I'm kind of dreading the gong show tonight could turn out to be....

I'll try to get pics....LOL1

Late night T.V. SUCKS!

The cold I thought I was getting a few days ago has come and kicked me in the ass.

I fell asleep around 9 pm Saturday night, thanks to NyQuil, (aka. liquid slacker.) in the hopes that I would sleep through the night...Nope didn’t happen. I am up at this stupid hour with nothing to do and nothing to really say....

Later today I’m going shopping with my Mother for a Birthday outfit...Don’t know if I’m really up to it. I KNOW my pocketbook isn’t up to it, maybe I will find a nice top to go with something I already have or just buy a pair of jeans, I actually need another pair so that might make me feel better....

 

3 more days and I will be 40....YIKES!

The weekend is almost here..YAY!....
I don't know why I'm getting all excited, I don't really get a weekend...

Tomorrow is a Pro D day so I will have ALL the kids ALL day....And  2 of them are grounded......Joy of Joys!

 

 

Short and sweet today.

 

Have a great Thursday!

Rick and I have our issues and I know things need to change...But I realised today there is one thing I never have to worry about...

 

I NEVER have to worry about weather or not he wants to see me, he always does....it's just sometimes he wants to do other things more...I don't like that, no one does....I maybe passed over for a down and dirty bike ride, wicked powder on the mountain or (and this one pisses me off the most.) drinks with the guys. But I'll tell you he would never use the excuse that gas costs too much or the fact that I live an hour (when traffic's good) away... That sort of thing has never been an issue with us.
And I really feel bad for people it is an issue for. (and believe it or not there are people this is an issue for.)

See?

I was looking for  a nice thought today and I found  one.

 Simple things make me happy....

 mmmmyummy! go on click it, you know you wanna. "GRIN"

Check out pic #6 it just does something for me.

 

 

Well yesterday started with Tessa telling me that she was thinking of quitting school....Do you know how hard it was for me NOT too EXSPLODE?

But I know my kid she was looking for me to blow up, so she could start a fight and then  say "See this is why...I can't handle your yelling ....." 

You see everything is my fault. Everything from her being sick all the time, to the China trip being canceled, (only 2 students signed up.) to....Oh I don't know, to the sky being grey when it should be blue...

She is 16 going on 17 so I am to blame for EVERTHING. I know this, I understand this, so I didn't freak out I just calmly said, "OK. go to school today and get your resume fixed up and  tell who you need to tell that you are leaving school and we will go from there." She wasn't expecting that and changed her tune real fast.

When she left I phoned the counselor. 

She had hidden her interim reports from me, not so much as to hide her grades but to hide how many classes she had missed, some of which I knew about because of illness the rest were just plain skipping....

I have done everything I can to help her but now it's up to her too get the work done, the counselor is going to arrange some after school help.

We've also found a Doctor that she (Tessa) likes and we are doing another round of tests, even though we know to a point what is wrong this Doc wants to do the tests again and hopefully this time Tessa will listen and do what she needs to do to get better.

I hope everyone is having a good day.

 

 

I think I'm getting a cold....

Monday morning....And it’s started off with a BANG, I can’t really talk about it yet because well, I don’t have all the facts yet, but let me tell you heads are going to ROLL if things aren’t fixed and fixed right quick!

GOD! I hate public schools.

You Know? I’ve been trying to think positively, get on with getting on, but I’m having a hard time of it.

That’s why I haven’t really been posting too much; I’m tired of my own whining.

I just need a moment of peace, I try to create at least one in every day but I haven’t been able too for a long time now. I need help and I don’t know where to find it.

~Add on~

I just finished talking with the school cousellor (for 45 minutes) because she seems to be the only one Tessa will talk too, I don't know how much good it's going to do, it might even cause more problems but I don't know what else to do...I can only hope I've done the right thing.

It’s another Saturday....

The boys should be here in a little while; it’s going to be loooog day and night because the Mother is taking Tessa to:

 

FightNight 

 

They can't take the boys because it's too scary for them.

 

ARRRRG!

I was able to rename the links on my page (once) now I can't can anyone help me with an easy way to do this?

 

 

 

 

I saw the Doc, he said that the eye looks like it should and gave me some drops to take away the swelling and redness and once that’s gone it will look more normal, but it will take up to 6 wks for full results....NICE.

This is my favorite time of year....But I’m not finding the joy in it that I usually do, maybe when I can get a minute to myself that doesn’t involve sleeping I will go and enjoy the colours and smells of autumn’s glory.  

K, so I still think people suck....Not my blog peeps they are cool...Well most are geeks like me and that’s just fine I like it that way.

I still want my island, but I’m making do.

I went out today to get some things done, banking, post office, crap like that...Had a nice break hunting around Chapter’s for a while.

April came and took me to lunch.

Today was her treat day and she wanted to share it with me, we went to White Spot and had spicy Thai curry shrimp, a little hot but SO good.

April wants to come to my island too, I wish she could, and it would be nice if sunshine could shrink her tumors too.

She hasn’t started chemo yet, and to be honest I don’t know if she’s going to.

She asked if I had read this book about loss and grieving she had given me, I told her I wasn’t ready to read it yet, she just smiled a sad smile....

I said just how much this SUCKS lately? No? Well it SUCKS!

 

Anyway...

I went out without my sunglasses because well, it was a grey rainy day...I actually found it amusing that people couldn’t look me in the eye and if they did they would rub their eye....LOL!

Yes, it still looks bad and is pretty crooked, but I see the Doc tomorrow and I will ask him how much longer I will look demented.

Hopefully it will be cleared up before my birthday....But I doubt it will matter anyway.  

 

 

 

 

 

Dinner was OK...

I should have cooked it...

That’s all I’m going to say about that...

The patch was very uncomfortable so I took it off and the 3 nephews that were there couldn’t look at me so I ate dinner with my sun glasses on.

 

Recipe for Momma’s Momma

 

Turnip/Carrot Mash

 

6 carrots

1or 2 good size turnips

2 heaping table spoons butter

Garlic (powder or fresh) to taste

Salt to taste

Pepper to taste

 

Cut carrots and turnips roughly the same size and boil or steam until tender

Then mash together with the butter, salt and pepper.

If you want it a little smoother you can add some milk, cream or chicken stock or even some of the cooking water.

 

Another way you can do it is take the carrots and turnip and some garlic cloves and roast them in the oven...

 

Cut carrots and turnips into pieces the same size as the garlic cloves (I would use 3 or 4 cloves), toss together with olive oil, salt and pepper.

Roast in the oven at 350 until tender.

I would use a little chicken stock here to help mash, because roasting the veg and garlic will make them sweeter and the stock will add some savory flavor.

 

Enjoy

 

Today has been an OK kind of day….I still don’t like the look of my eye, but I have to believe it will get better, it’s only been 1 day right?

It looks like I might be going to my brother’s for Thanksgiving…I don’t know because I’m still ticked at him, but if I go I will be wearing a patch because my eye looks gross!

I have been sleeping off and on all day, (trying to get all the knock out gas out of my system.), during one of my naps Tessa surprised me by cleaning the kitchen, and I mean she CLEANED it, I haven’t see it this clean in so long I almost forgot how much counter space I actually had.. LOL!

Now if we could do that good of a job to the rest of the house…Oh well we’ll get to it soon enough, (knock wood that I’m not laid up with something else anytime soon.)

 

Take care and I hope all my Canadian friends have a WONDERFUL Thanksgiving.

 

The Doc said the Op went fine...it looks bad and I am seeing double off and on. My eye is watering like a water fall.

But not too worry it will all clear up soon enough.

I have been sleeping on and off all day.

I had to hide from the boys when they first got here because for the first couple of hours my tears were bloody, Tessa was disappointed she didn't get to see that....She thought that it would have looked cool...Strange kid....LOL!

I was a good patient today.

I woke up, did what I was told, then the doc came in to do a last minute adjustment to a stitch, it was kind of cool and creepy to watch him tying a stitch in in the corner of my eye...Kinda hurt too.

Then I was put in another room and rested for a while, then when I was able to sit myself up I asked for my Mother and she came in and I asked her to help me get dressed....The nurse said, "Oh no not yet, you still have 30 minutes to go yet."

I said  "Let's say the 30  minutes are up and call it good K?""

The nurse started to argue with me and my Mother stepped in and said, "She's been very good and nice, and if you want her to stay nice you will walk away right now."

The nurse said , "I can handle a little crankiness..."

My Mum said, "No you don't understand, the meds  combined with the pain she is in because she has had to lay on her back will make her very angery and unreasonable, it's best to just let her go now."

The nurse said , " I gave her 2  T3s a little while a go, the pain shouldn't be too bad."

My Mother just shook her head.

This whole time I was trying to dress myself, and muttering  not very nice things.

My Mother said in that MOM voice "Cindy."

I said in my best snotty teenager voice "What? I just want a Pumpkin spice latte and my own bed."

Then I  said to the nurse, "I'm ready to go, there is no point trying to make me stay and rest because I won't, the faster I get home the faster I will be able to rest....So thank you and I hope you have a good day."

We left I got my coffee and  my bed.

I'm going to go back to bed now.

 

Nite, Nite.

Well I’m off to bed, after Grey’s Anatomy and one more cup of coffee.

I need to get up at 6 am, have a quick shower, NOT have coffee, (that is going to suck monkey butt.) get in a car with my Mother and drive for I don’t know how long and find a hospital we’ve never been to, and go through what I stated in my last entry.

Then I get to look after (with a lot of help from Tessa.) Look after the boys…Oh don’t look at me like that!

There is no one else to look after these boys, I’m sure if they tried harder the Mother’s could find someone but it ALWAYS turns into a nightmare and it takes me a week or more to fix the damage.

These boys don't handle change well, so I'm picking the shorter duration of stress.

It has taken me over a hour to to type this, watching T.V. and typing is not easy..LOL! 

Good night, see ya when I get back.

Well it’s just 2 more sleeps until I go under again…

I’m just going to cut and paste the comment I posted on Momma’s space, to explain what is going to happen Friday;

 

~The operation is going to be real easy, get to the hospital at an ungodly hour of the morning wait around for any where from 1 to 3 hours, get to take a deep nap for 20 minutes, get rudely awoken from said nap, with an itchy eye to fight with a nurse who wants me to stay for another 2 hours until I’m “fully” awake and doesn’t believe that BECAUSE she has woken me up and irritated the HELL out of me, I AM “fully” awake and will be going home as soon as my ride shows up...And said ride (if they know what’s good for them.) will be there before I finish getting my shoes on.

I think I have said before, I don’t wake up from general anastia (sp?) very happy or nice.

Good thing though...

There will be no bruising, bandages or patches. Just some redness and a stitch inside my eye that will dissolve in 4 to 6 weeks.

And since I can’t see out of the eye they are operating on anyway, I will probably be able to give an update later in the day Friday. ~

 

So far Tessa hasn’t from any of the places she put her resume in…But it’s only been 2 days, I won’t panic just yet…

Even though I truly appreciate prayers, well wishes and good thoughts concerning my operation, could you PLEASE say them for Tessa’s job search?

Thank you!

Have a great night

~PS~

Even though this operation is considered non invasive, I am under orders to rest for five days , (yeah like THAT will happen!)  to let the stitch take. So it looks like I might miss (Canadian) Thanksgiving (Monday the 13th) ....Second year in a row...That SUCKS!

 

 

I want to go here or here both places would do my soul a world of good. Another place would be here  I found that last one through my blog buddy Kat ; she went there this weekend and had a wonderful time. We are both very lucky to live in places that allow us to “Get away” to another place and time in our own back yards.

 

Yes, I want to run away, run away from the responsibility, uncertainty, and ugliness that is in my life right now, even if it’s only for a couple of days.

I want to fall asleep to the sounds of water or the forest in a big comfy bed and have guilt free meals served to me in bed or on a private deck over looking the water…

 

Yes, I know that everything will still be there when I get back, but I REALLY NEED the recharge…

 

If you haven’t done so already take a look over my posts over the past month or so and you will understand.

 

I don’t mean to sound negative but… The sad thing is, there is nothing I can do to change anything that is going on, I just have to ride it out and hope I make it to the other side in one piece.  

Even knowing my best friend won’t be there with me.